Who's Your Daddy?

I've often said to people who are waiting to hear God's voice something along these lines, "don't expect to hear his voice thundering through the clouds!" And for all of those times I've said something like that, I should be slapped on the hand.

Because this morning, God spoke to me. In case you're wondering, I will admit that it was not an audible discussion, but it may as well have been. Sometimes--or more truthfully, often--I forget that God does speak to us, as clearly as if we were standing right in front of him. The question is, are we listening?

I will no longer hold you in suspense. Here is the story: 

Last night, at the dinner table, Eric and I were discussing whether or not children are a product of their environment. We were able to look at several children we knew, their families, our own, and come to the conclusion that yes, children are surely a result of their environments. For instance, what are the values that parents are instilling in their children, and how do we see that play out in their behavior? What birth order are they? Oldest? Youngest? Were they sheltered and hugged every time they took a tumble, or were they picked on by siblings? Et cetera... 

Nora is a little spitfire, as I've said in previous posts. She will allow only a certain amount of cuddling before becoming frustrated with the confinement and trying to escape our kisses. Surely a result of how much we smothered her with love when she was a baby--and, I might add, would continue to be doing if she let us. Apparently there is such a thing as too much lovin'. 

Anyway, I went to sleep last night feeling a bit overwhelmed by it all because, if the above is true, then isn't it my job, as a parent, to do my best to control that environment that shapes my children? If I don't protect them from those experiences that could harden them to life, make them bitter and angry people, isn't that on me? 

This morning, God said otherwise. 

I was doing a devotional reading in 1 Peter 1:1-9. For the sake of making an already verbose story a bit more concise, I will only delve into the relevant part of the passage which begins like this: "1) Peter, an apostle of Jesus the Messiah, to God's chosen ones who live as foreigners among the Dispersion of Pontus, Galatia, Cappadocia, Asia and Bithynia, 2) who have been set aside in advance by God the father, through the sanctification of the spirit, for obedience and for sprinkling with the blood of Jesus the Messiah. May grace and peace be poured out lavishly on you!" (1 Peter 1:1-2) 

The commentator to the devotional, NT Wright, starts right off the bat by explaining: "This is what Christians are: chosen; set aside; sanctified for obedience; sprinkled with the Messiah's blood!" So, then, is it not about our ancestry, social status, class, birth order, family name, or anything else? If we take what the Bible says to heart, then it's about only one thing: our identity in Christ. This alone ought to be what shapes us. 

Even more, Wright encourages us to remind ourselves daily of who we really are, or else we will begin to listen to the "insidious messages we get from the world around (that we are who we are because of who our parents are, where we live or how much we earn)."

...Seriously, could God's voice get any clearer?  

The world is always trying to shape us. Its voice seems, at times, much more persuasive than God's. The problem with not understanding who we are in Christ, is that it can make us give up on evolving into a more mature character and faith before we ever really get going. How easy is it to lower your own expectations for yourself, telling yourself that you are a victim of your upbringing? You don't expect yourself to be any better given the circumstances, and neither does anyone else. How easy to compare yourself to others who have had similar experiences, and feel better about where you are--but not compelled to go any further. 

Unless we know who we are and the designs that God has for our lives, we will allow our environments to shape us. Maybe without us even knowing it. 

But when we know that he has called us to greater heights and greater depths, perhaps we are more willing to live into those things. Perhaps we will actually believe we can reach those places and make the consequent changes in our lives. 

As a parent, I am learning that, although the environment that Nora grows up in is important, teaching her of her identity in Christ is exceedingly more so. If God's voice is louder and clearer than all the other voices around her then it won't matter what earthly experiences she has. This is what it means to become like a house, built upon a rock. Steady and sure, by God's great grace. 

The Rudder of a Ship: Which direction are you going?

This morning, my husband and I woke up before dawn broke (too early!) and came downstairs to make a pot of coffee and sit at our little breakfast table to read our devotion together. I mentioned in a previous post that we are reading, Early Christian Letters for Everyone by N.T Wright as part of a new routine. And, let me tell you, it is amazing to see how just a little bit of time with God in the morning can change the entire direction of your day.

Which brings me to my point this morning: in James 3:1-12*, we see that the tongue is a very small part of the body, similar to a rudder on a ship, and yet it steers and guides a person, controls where they are headed. One slip of the tongue, and you can easily go off into an entirely different direction.

James warns that being a teacher is a risky profession. How easy to send your pupils off in a certain direction, perhaps determining the course of their life. It is one thing if that direction is a good one, but what if something you say sends them in the wrong direction?

My children (Nora and any other future children; I feel the need to clarify this) are my most obvious pupils. I am responsible for teaching and guiding them. So what is it that I am instilling in their lives?

The other night, I went out to Target for a quick errand and left Nora at home with Eric. While I was in the store, I heard soft whistling coming from the grocery aisles. In the refrigerator section, I saw the source. It was a young boy, probably about 10-12 years old. He was teaching his little brother (maybe about 5 years old?) how to whistle. I smiled at them and proceeded to pick out my food, taking my time, not realizing that they were waiting for me to move aside so that they, too, could grab the same item. When I realized, I apologized for taking so long but they were very gracious, especially for being so young. I was struck by how sweet they were to me.

Anyway, I continued through the grocery aisles, every once and a while hearing the same whistling. When it was time to check out, I stood behind them in line as the three boys helped their mom load their groceries onto the belt. And then, again, load the bags back into the cart. Meanwhile, their mother complained about them to the cashier.

To say that I was shocked would be an understatement. I listened to her talk, and watched the boys more closely, wondering if I was missing some sort of bad behavior. But all I saw were these boys serving their mother quietly, as she was slandering them publicly -- and right in front of them too!

After saying that they drove her crazy, she said something along the lines that she had five children, but "at least I got two girls out of it all."

Oh, my heart broke! These little boys, hearing so plainly their mother's favoring.

I could keep quite no longer, so I spoke up and said that I had witnessed them practicing their whistling and thought they had been very sweet and well-behaved. Of course, I said this in a much kinder and friendlier way than I truly wanted. These same words, spoken in a different tone, could have been pretty vicious. I couldn't help thinking that maybe the mother needed to hear a few choice strong words, but instead, I tried to gently show the mother that she ought to be careful what she said about her sons. And hoped, at the very least, that these children heard me speaking positive things about them.

As a mom, especially, when you are in the house all day with your little ones, it can feel like you are quite stuck there. It is easy to resent the children that seem to "imprison" you. But every word out of your mouth can bring blessing or curses. What are you showering your children with? These young, moldable, and innocent children who look to you for direction... What direction are you heading them in? One that says they are a nuisance? A burden to you?

I pray every day that God protects Nora from my sin, but that is not an excuse to live in sin. Instead, I must try to show Nora each and every day what a blessing she is to me. How she brings joy and life into every moment.

If all we do is tell our children that they are incapable of doing something right, is it any wonder that they grow up and live in that? How much different would our world be if parents chose to pour blessings over their kids instead of slandering them? Maybe they would grow up to become adults who are confident in who they are and the good that they can do.

Just a quick disclaimer: Perhaps, because I am a mom, I tend to think of teaching Nora first. But the truth is, any time I give advice or mentor someone, I am "teaching" them. I am guiding them in a certain direction through my words. James warns that teachers are judged by God more severely, so the lesson to take away is that we better be careful what it is that we are saying.


* "1) Not many of you should become teachers, my brothers and sisters; you know that we will be judged more severely. 2) All of us make many mistakes, after all. If anyone makes no mistakes in what they say, such a person is a fully complete human being, capable of keeping firm control over the whole body as well. 3) We put bits into the mouths of horses to make them obey us, and then we can direct their whole bodies. 4) Consider, too, the case of large ships; it takes strong winds to blow them along, but one small rudder will turn them whichever way the helmsman desires and decides. 5) In the same way, the tongue   is a little member but boasts great things. See how small a fire it takes to set a large forest ablaze! 6) And the tongue is a fire. The tongue is a world of injustice, with its place established right there among our members. It defiles the whole body; it sets the wheel of nature ablaze and is itself set ablaze by hell. 7) Every species of beast and bird, of reptile and sea creature, you see, can be tamed, and has been tamed, by humans. 8) But no single human is able to tame the tongue. It is an irrepressible evil, full of deadly poison. 9) By it we bless the Lord and father; and by it we curse humans who are made in God's likeness! 10) Blessing and curses come out of the same mouth! My dear family, it isn't right that it should be like that. 11) Does a spring put out both sweet and bitter water from the same source? 12) Dear friends, can a fig tree bear olives, or a vine bear figs? Not can salt water yield fresh.

James 3.1-12

It's the End of the World

I was at my parent's house on December 21, 2012, the day the world was supposed to end. The movie, 2012, was on TV and I'd never seen it before so I sat down to watch it. I quickly got sucked in to the graphics and storyline.

There's a scene near the beginning, when the world is quite literally falling apart, with a man standing on the top of a mountain rejoicing over what he is seeing. It's clear that the end of the world was something he believed in, had even been expecting. So when his beliefs are confirmed to be true, he is ecstatic instead of scared.

Now, as a Christian, I was quite certain that the end of the world would not occur on December 21 because the Bible teaches us that only God knows when Jesus will return. But, in the same way as the crazy man on the mountain in the movie, I too believe in the end of the world (at least, in the sense that we know it). But my beliefs differ in that they center around Jesus and his second-coming. He has promised to bring restoration, healing and peace to earth.

The day of the Newtown shooting in Connecticut, one of my Facebook friends posted something that caused me to pause. She wrote, "Lord, come quickly." I was moved by that response because the sad truth is, there will be another shooting. Not only that, but the tragedy that happened in Newtown is only a tiny fraction of the evil that occurs in the world at any given time. Think of all the wars we've seen; the genocide, the children forced to become soldiers, those that are trafficked, etc., etc. And even beyond that, the poverty, hunger, thirst and disease that permeates our planet. None of these issues will ever go away. This is evidence of the enemy of God seeking destruction.

That is, until Jesus comes again.

To see an end to all of our suffering, Jesus must return to right all of our wrongs. And He will. I believe that with everything in me. The question is, am I praying for that day to come quickly? Am I preparing for the day when all of our sorrows will be replaced with joy at seeing our Savior, as He fulfills prophecy and redeems the world?

Perhaps the most important thing for me to realize is that my waiting is not one of idleness. It should involve action. It should involve fruit. Although I am waiting for Jesus to come, knowing that He alone can truly restore our world, I can--and should--play my part in bringing His Kingdom that much closer.

We are on a sinking ship, but our Rescuer is coming. Our God is faithful and his character is to want to rescue us. We can rest assured that we are not waiting in vain. But in the meantime, do we not continue to bail the water out of the ship? Or do we sit, watching the water rise around our ankles? And then up to our waists?

What does that action look like for you? In what ways can you bring the Kingdom of God that much closer to your corner of the world?

"The time has come," [Jesus] said. "The kingdom of God is near. Repent and believe the good news!"
Mark 1:15

Don't Despise the Day of Small Things

I just returned home from a writer's conference in Philly and my heart is wrestling. I can't decide if I should be encouraged by the compliments and affirmation, or if I should temper my excitement with reality. The reality is, the road to publication is a long, bumpy, sinuous road.

But I met with a friend today and she confirmed something that I already knew -- God is planning my steps with purpose. My husband, Eric, is my biggest cheerleader. Sometimes he has so much faith in me I know I'll let him down. But I think he was sent directly from God, meant to encourage me on this journey so I don't give up when the going gets tough. Without his full-hearted belief in my craft, I wouldn't have even made it this far in my writing.

So it encouraged me to see all the little places that God is planning my steps. And when I look for them, I see them everywhere! I haven't been able to find a job this past year - much to my dismay. But without one, I spent all my free time writing. And now I've finished my book. Maybe it was a blessing, then?

Think about where you are right now. Are you working toward a goal? Something you feel like God has placed on your heart for you to do? Is it missions? Or pursuing a childhood dream? Or even sharing with your coworkers about the love of Jesus?

Delight in the small things. Zechariah 4:10.

Since it normally is a long road before we see fruit for our labors, learn to love the small things that God gives us to show that we are on the right path -- even the encouragement of someone else. Maybe God sent them there to do just that. To encourage you toward the goals He has set before you. Because He has given you the ability. So use your talent - don't hide it - and He'll do even greater things in you.

I am praying specifically for Kingdom Creativity -- for me, and everyone else who is tackling a form of the arts to reveal God's love and truth.

Book Review

A while ago, I read the most incredible series that literally changed my life. I know, that sounds dramatic. :) It's the Mark of the Lion series by Francine Rivers.

If any of you have spent time with me recently, you know how much I talk about these books. Probably to the point of being obnoxious.

But the main character, Hadassah, astounds me. Actually, everything about these books impacted me. They take place in 70 AD, just a few decades after Jesus died on the cross. The details included in these historical fiction books make the entire Bible come alive. When I read Romans now, I can picture Rome. I can visualize the wickedness, the idolatry and the promiscuity in this vulgar society.

When the book takes you to Corinth, all of a sudden, everything in the books of Corinthians seems truly legitimate. The call for purity and holiness was urgent and necessary.

But, the best part of the book was the story of forgiveness. **Don't worry, I won't give anything away, since I'm sure you'll want to read these books!**

We all know the story of when Judas betrays Jesus. I couldn't even tell you the first time I heard the story, but I would guess around the age of 6 or 7. Either way, the meaning was lost on me back then. And I somehow lost the imapact of the story. Every time afterward, I read about Judas' betrayal and it came as no surprise. I expected it. So it was almost like the emotions were removed from my experience. I didn't really think about how Jesus felt when one of His best friend's chose to turn Him in to the Pharisees, ultimately leading to His death on the cross. Did Jesus feel unloved? Used? Inadequate? Insecure? Even being fully God, Jesus was fully man. So he felt all the emotions we do.

In the Mark of the Lion, there is a betrayal not unlike what happened to Jesus. And this time, I didn't expect it. For the first time, I really imagined the situation. I could picture Jesus' face when Judas kissed him on the cheek. I could see His gentle eyes, filled with sadness. I felt His heart aching in His chest. Even the tears stinging His eyes.

Jesus had been innocent and pure, but still, He hung on a cross until death. For us. At any point, He could have called down a legion of angels. We wouldn't have stood a chance. But, He chose to be the final sacrifice. Our Savior. He destroyed death, so that we could spend eternity with Him.

Us. You and me. Even though we ridicule and mock Him, dishonor and disobey Him.

Betray Him.

Isn't there so much glory in that? So much LOVE.

In Him we live, move, and have our being.

I'm preparing for the arduous journey toward publication. I have nearly *finished* my first book (I say *finished* because, as any writer knows, there is no such thing as being finished. I think I am on version 398 of my book, with more to come).

The Pursuer takes place in England, 1816, and has been years in the making. I am half excited to be so far along, and half petrified that the pursuit of publication is just around the corner (whoa, alliteration!). I've heard horror stories of people writing 17 novels before ever getting published--although maybe that's not a horror story at all. At least they were published. I can only pray that I am so blessed.

I plan on using this blog for many purposes, mainly to post news about writing and my book. But sprinkled throughout, I'll probably share what God is teaching me. Right now, I am learning about trusting in Him -- even BEFORE I start looking for a publisher.

I've had moments of panic already. I've spent so much time pouring into my book, what if it never gets published? And then I think of all the people who would know about my failure, my lack of success--how humiliating. On top of that, Regan and Seth's story would never be told, which saddens me because I think (of course) that it is a wonderful story.

...And then I am reminded that I am not writing for myself. Or even for others' enjoyment. I am writing for the pleasure of the King. I am using the gifts He has given me, and I am cultivating them. Whether or not I ever become a published author does not matter.

"Am I now trying to win the approval of men, or of God? Or am I trying to please men? If I were still trying to please men, I would not be a servant of God." Galations 1:10.

I pray that God does use me to share the message of His love and mercy through the stories in my books. I want to be like clay in His hands, molded into a place where I can be a vessel for His light. So many books that I've read have empowered me, inspired me, and transformed my heart to be more like His. I only pray that God uses me to reach others with His love. How humbling to be used by God.